


(re)building bridges

by Stromesquad



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-23 11:52:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14331894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stromesquad/pseuds/Stromesquad
Summary: Mikko doesn't really know what happened between Tyson and Gabe but it's rapidly becoming a problem.





	(re)building bridges

**Author's Note:**

> Big thank you to Lotts, Ash, Ki, Rach, Leia, and Aimee for looking this over and extra big thank you to Aimee for the title. 
> 
>  
> 
> See end for more notes including untagged characters.

Mikko doesn't really know what happened between Tyson and Gabe but it's rapidly becoming a problem. Things with Dutchy are as bad as possible which is stressful enough, but add in top of that, Tyson and Gabe are definitely not talking. Tyson is sitting in his stall across the room from where Gabe is standing, staring at him sadly, while Gabe glares at everyone and anyone, except that he won’t look at anyone. It’s starting to fuck with the team. Last season, they were… a thing. No one talked but everyone knew so Mikko just kind of let it be and minded his own business about it. But now… well, no one seems to be stepping in, not even Nate. Not that Nate is a voice of reason in that friendship, that was Gabe’s job. 

 

After practice, about a month into the season, Mikko has had enough. If no one else is going to deal with this, he’ll push up his sleeves, take one for the team. He corners Gabe before practice and asks if they can meet to go over some tape together. After, he grabs Tyson, mumbling something about questions about the powerplay unit and pulls him to the room where Gabe is waiting. Mikko sees Gabe in there so he shoves Tyson in and closes the door. He holds it closed as Gabe tries to open it from the inside.    
  


“Mikko, let me out!” Gabe calls. 

 

“Not until you talk.” 

 

“Mikko, come on.”

 

“Nope. Not moving.”

 

He sits there and waits through a long silence from the room until he hears some muffled arguing. He tries his best not to listen in. It doesn’t always sound angry. Sometimes it just sounds sad and Mikko supposes that’s fair. If they broke up, sadness is fine, but they still have to talk. After about an hour, when the shouting has turned to silence, Gabe knocks on the door. Mikko opens it a crack.

 

“We talked. Are you happy? Can I go home now? I need to walk Zoey.” Gabe doesn’t look angry, he just looks tired. 

 

Mikko relents and lets him out. Tyson follows out behind him looking a little broken down. Tyson is a generally happy guy. He’s fun, and funny, and outgoing. He’s the life of the party, so seeing him look so down makes Mikko’s heart hurt. He never wants to see anyone look like that, but especially not someone as bright as Tyson. So, plan A has failed spectacularly. Maybe the key is making them be together but not alone. Maybe that will make them want to work out their differences.

 

***

 

Mikko makes a new plan. He’s going to invite them both out to dinner with him, like they would sometimes do last year.  And this way they have to at least be nice to each other since it’s in public. Forced exposure in a non team setting sounds like a good plan. It’s going to be awkward, but Mikko can deal with that, as long as it gets them to like look at each other at the same time. He texts Gabe and Tyson separately after practice to see if they want to meet up for dinner and both say yes. Plan B is a go.

 

Mikko gets to the restaurant 10 minutes early because he’s nervous. This is a risk and one or both of them could storm off but he’s counting on Tyson being the disaster that he is and getting there after he and Gabe are already seated. The plan works in that Gabe is five minutes early and Tyson is 10 minutes later but they’re still waiting at the hostess station to be seated despite Mikko’s reservation. Gabe sees Tyson first.

 

“Mikko, no,” he says, sounding both forlorned and resigned to his fate. He won’t leave, that much is clear from the stubborn look on his face. Uncomfortable he may be, but Mikko knows he won’t back out on this dinner.

 

“I just thought it might be nice. We always had fun when we did it last year.” 

 

“Yeah, we did but…” 

 

Gabe is interrupted by Tyson’s arrival and audible “Oh no.” Tyson’s smile falters a little as he walks up but he pastes it back on, like he’s determined to get through this and look like he’s having fun for Mikko’s sake.

 

_ Fake it til you make it  _ Mikko thinks is a phrase he’s heard used before.

 

They finally get seated after 5 minutes of stilted small talk and Tyson and Gabe refusing to make eye contact. It’s going to be a long dinner but it’ll be worth it if they’ll just stop being so frosty. 

 

It kind of works. Mikko brings up hockey. 

 

“I think it’s going to be a good year,” he says with the confidence he knows only youth can give him. He’s only been in the league one year, the worst possible year, but he sees something special out there.

 

“Well, I don’t think it can possibly get worse,” Tyson says honestly. “If it does, we’re fucking cursed.”

 

Gabe lets out a horse chuckle. “Let’s hope we don’t have to exorcise any demons.” 

 

“We can do this. I believe in us.” Mikko smiles as he speaks. He feels the certainty in his bones. “We’ve got some good players.”

 

“We do.”

 

Talk is kind of stilted and awkward after that, but it’s there. Tyson and Gabe are speaking to each other without glaring daggers and as the meal continues, their shoulders drop and they relax. By the end it’s not quite comfortable, but something like it. Mikko thinks maybe he can do this again and again and again if he has to. There’s no way their friendship at the very least can’t be fixed.

 

***

 

After the dinner, Gabe and Tyson have stopped staring daggers at each other across the room and will even share the occasional friendly smile in the locker room. It’s not better but it’s something. Technically, Mikko has accomplished his goal of making the locker room less frosty and getting Tyson and Gabe to at least speak to each other at team stuff. They go out for sushi after practice.

 

Tyson tells a story about his summer. “So my sister takes me out fishing and we’re on the boat. None of us are catching anything so she tells me it’s because I smell so bad. So I finally get a fish and it’s a small so I can’t keep it but first I make it look like it’s going to kiss her and she pushes me in! Right off the back of the boat, fish and all! The fish obviously swam away. Didn’t even get to take a picture to prove I caught something. I was going to send it to Nate.” 

 

Gabe lets out a full bodied laugh, eyes crinkling at the corners, mouth wide and happy. It’s like he’s forgotten that he’s still supposed to be mad. 

 

“Hey, can’t I get a little sympathy? I was still wearing a shirt! I ruined one of my button downs.”

 

“Sorry buddy but you should have known better? Who wears a shirt like that fishing?”

 

“Lots of people!” Tyson tries to defend himself. “I know other people who do it!”

 

“Like who?” Mikko asks and Tyson mutters under his breath about not being able to think of anyone at that moment. Gabe’s laughing again, smile wide and open. Tyson starts laughing too and Mikko’s heart flutters. He tells himself it’s just because he’s happy they’re all getting along again. 

 

After that it’s like the floodgates open and the rest of lunch is full of laughter.

 

***

 

One afternoon, Tyson and Gabe come over for video games, pizza, and beer. He and Gabe are sitting next to each other on the couch. Tyson arrives late, as usual, and throws himself down between them. This is a new development. To be sitting between them, Tyson has to be touching both Mikko and Gabe and as far as Mikko has seen, they have been avoiding that. Which is weird for Tyson, he touches everyone. Mikko takes this as a very positive sign and very much ignores a pulling sensation he feels in the pit of his stomach at the thought of spending time pressed this close to Tyson. He shifts over to get a little space. He stays pressed close to Gabe. 

 

“So, Chel or Fortnite?” Mikko asks. 

 

“Chel?” Gabe says at the same time as Tyson says “Fortnite.” They both laugh easily. It’s a warm bright harmony that Mikko is happy to hear. His heartbeat picks up a little at the sound. 

 

“Chel wins.” He goes and sets up the game and sits back down to play. Tyson has shifted over a little so he’s not sitting so close to Gabe anymore but not enough to put Mikko between them so Mikko sits back down on Tyson’s other side, giving him enough space to move around on the couch without having to be too close to Gabe. Whatever early measure of comfort, or maybe automatic action, seems to have worn off and there’s a slight chill in place again although it’s getting better.

 

They play games for a while, bodies sliding ever closer as they play, elbowing each other to interrupt until Tyson just up and sits in Gabe’s lap in their third round of NHL 3s to try and get an advantage.

 

“Tyson! What the fuck?” Gabe asks, leaning around him to see.

 

“Whatever you giant Viking. It’s not like you can’t see around me if I do this. I don’t have a giant head like you.” 

 

“Oh here we go with the big head jokes. It’s always the big head jokes with you. Come up with some new material and get off my lap.”

 

Mikko can’t help but laugh. This is it. This is the old Tyson and Gabe, before everything went south and maybe before everything even started. They’re being playful and chirping and if there’s anything anyone knows it’s the line between flirting and chirping does not exist for Tyson and Gabe. Mikko is content to just watch.

 

Eventually Gabe stands up to get Tyson off his lap and it’s like the spell breaks. The moment shatters into a thousand little pieces that end in Gabe saying “I have to go,” and storming out of the apartment.

 

“Well, I guess that just happened.” Tyson sighs defeatedly.

 

“Are you okay?” 

 

“Not really…” Tyson trails off. “It was nice. It felt like we were getting somewhere but I guess not.”

 

“Can I ask… What happened?”

 

“Well, I’m guessing you figured out that we hooked up pretty much all last season.” Mikko nods and Tyson continues. “Well, I wanted it to be more. But… We went to worlds and he said no hooking up or anything while we were there which I guess made sense. Team bonding, playing against each other, whatever. But it stung a little. And I thought it was going to be just for worlds and that we’d be fine after. Then he went back to Sweden and he never called. It broke my heart that he didn’t. And I thought I was okay but then I saw him and well… I’m not. I’m trying to be but I’m not. And today was so good. But…” Tyson takes a deep breath, obviously trying not to cry. “I miss my friend.” 

 

Mikko puts an arm around Tyson’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.” It’s all he can think of to say. He doesn’t want his friend to be sad. 

 

“It’s shitty but it is what it is, I guess.” Tyson shrugs. 

“Have you tried talking to him about it?”

 

“I should have. I maybe should have called him instead of waiting. Now it feels like it’s too late to reach out. I don’t really know why he’s mad.” 

 

“Maybe you should ask him.”

 

“I know. It’s just… It’s hard. I miss him and I want to be his friend again. You’re helping though. I… I appreciate that you’re trying to help.”

 

“Of course. You guys are my friends.” 

 

“I just…”

 

“Talk to him. It might go better than you think. What’s the worst that could happen? You fight?”

 

“I mean, we’re already not really talking so it can’t get much worse. I’m… I have to go.” 

 

“Text me later.”

 

“ I will. Thanks… For everything. I’ll talk to you later.” Tyson gets up to leave but doubles back and gives Mikko a long hug. “You’re a really good friend.” 

 

Mikko’s body tingles where they touched. It’s a developing problem but he can deal. He just wants Tyson and Gabe to happy. 

 

***

 

A week later, Mikko is a little early for practice when he walks past a training room. He hears Tyson and Gabe talking. He peeks through the door. Tyson is smiling and laughing and Gabe has a hand on his shoulder. It’s… both nice to see and kind of terrible if the twist in his gut is anything to go by. The laughter stops. He maybe shouldn’t listen but stays to anyway.

 

“Thanks for listening. I missed you,” Mikko hears Tyson say. 

 

“I missed you too. I didn’t mean to cut you out this summer, it just… before I knew it, it was time for training camp and I hadn’t called, you hadn’t called…”   
  


“I’m sorry. I should have. If I’d known or if I hadn’t been…” Tyson interrupts but trails off. 

 

“It’s on me.” Gabe says matter of factly. “I was the one who said we should stop and then I just never called.” 

 

“We can be friends again, right?” 

 

“I’m always going to be your friend but,” Gabe sighs. “Can we maybe, start over? And like go on an actual date?” 

 

“Yes. Please.” Mikko can hear the grin in Tyson’s voice and ouch this kind of hurts.  _ This is what you wanted,  _ he reminds himself. He walks away before he has to hear anymore. He should have never listened in. He goes to the locker room and tries to distract himself by getting ready for practice. He’s the first on the ice, skating slow, lazy circles when someone bumps into his side.

 

“You okay?” That someone turns out to be Nail. “You look a little sad.”

 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired today.”

 

“You sure?” Nail looks so painfully sincere and concerned that Mikko has to give him a smile.

 

“Yeah. Hey, do you maybe want to hang out after practice?” 

 

“Yeah, absolutely!” Nail’s smile widens. It’s sometimes hard to make friends when you’re the new guy, so Mikko is happy to step up and step in. He feels bad he’s been neglecting other people in his effort to help Tyson and Gabe. Maybe making a new friend is a good distraction. 

 

He goes through practice determined and focused but trying to have fun. He goofs around with Z, puts his stick on his head and pretends to be a unicorn, just, attempting to have a good time and hiding his inner turmoil from everyone else. It seems to work because no one else says anything. 

 

Hanging out with Nail turns out not to be as great a distraction as he’d hoped because once they’re at the table, Nail says, “I know you’re not tired. You are sad. Why?”

 

“Homesick. I had a good summer in Finland and I miss my mom.” It’s not a total lie. He does miss his mom and he is a little homesick. Nail seems to take it at face value, or understand that that’s all he’s going to get out of Mikko for now. They chat about easy topics for the rest of lunch and just kind of hang out. By the end of lunch, he’s smiling easily, feeling better and letting go of his darker thoughts. 

 

“We do this again sometime?” Nail asks as they pay the bill.

 

“Yeah, anytime!” Mikko says with an enthusiasm he means. It’s good to make new friends.

***

 

Project: Ignore Feelings goes really well for a couple of weeks until Mikko sees Gabe and Tyson kissing. He stayed late after practice to go over a piece of video with the coaching staff. He thought he was the only player left but when he walks into the locker room, he catches Gabe kissing Tyson, and of course it’s in front of Gabe’s stall, which is next to his. Mikko accidently knocks over the trash can by the door making noise and causing Tyson and Gabe to spring apart. 

 

“We were just…” Tyson starts

 

“We’re sorry we didn’t know…” Gabe says.

 

“It’s fine.” Mikko’s voice comes out a little high pitched. He swallows hard and pushes down the churning feeling that rises in his throat. “It’s fine. You guys are fine. I’m sorry I interrupted.” 

 

“You didn’t interrupt anything but we uh… we should probably be a little more careful and keep this out of here.” 

 

“You’re fine. It’s fine. I should um... I should just grab my stuff and I’ll be out of your hair.”

 

“Sure, sure,” Tyson says as he steps aside, letting Mikko get to space. 

 

Mikko grabs his phone and keys, says a quick strangled goodbye and all but runs from the room. He speed walks to his car and manages to drive home without losing it. When he gets home, he shuts and locks the door, turns around and slides down the wall and sits. He doesn’t know how long he stays there, just breathing in and out, fighting the urge to cry. Mikko realizes, in this moment, that he’s in love with them. Not just one, but both. He’s in love with both Tyson and Gabe and it’s a shit realization to have because they were never his to love. They were and are only each other’s.

 

After a while Mikko takes out his phone and texts Nail. They’ve been spending a lot of time together recently. He’s becoming a good friend and if he notices Mikko is sad, he doesn’t usually pry. Nail agrees to come over for takeout and movies and it’s a relief to not have to be alone. 

 

Nail comes over and asks Mikko if he’s okay but he doesn’t pry. He lets Mikko have his secrets but gives him a slightly knowing look. Maybe someday he’ll have to deal with this but today is not that day. He lets the movie wash over him and just, tries to let go.

  
  


***

 

Mikko makes the mistake of hanging out with Tyson and Gabe after they get back together. Gabe invites him over for dinner one evening and Mikko accepts because over and above his inconvenient feelings, they’re his friends. It… goes even worse than he could have ever imagined.

 

During dinner, Gabe looks at Mikko and says, “Mikko, we have to thank you. You have to know how much you helped us this year. I don’t think I would have ever had the courage to talk to Tyson without you.”

 

“Same,” Tyson chimes in. “I was hurting and you were there for me and you could see what I couldn’t. So thank you. For stepping in. For making us talk. You’ve been a rock.”

 

“You’re a great friend, Mikko.”

 

“I was happy to help. You’re re my friends. Of course I wanted to help.”

 

“Really. Thank you,” Gabe says as he takes Tyson’s hand on top of the table. 

 

And god it aches. Mikko feels the gaping hole in his heart opening wider watching them. They’re clearly so in love and Mikko will never be a part of that. He shouldn’t be a part of that. Honestly, he’s happy that they’re happy but it doesn’t take the sting out of watching their casual touch, the way they orbit each other’s space, at home and comfortable. It’s pretty clear that Tyson is spending more nights here than he is at home the way his things are just casually left around the apartment, a hoodie here, two pairs of dress shoes near the door. It’s all these little details that prove they’re building a life together and Mikko can never be part of that. It hurts more than words.

 

Instead of staying for a movie after, Mikko excuses himself. They’d had a tough practice that morning so it’s not a total lie when he says he’s just too tired. When he gets home, he crawls into an empty bed. He falls asleep hugging a pillow and if there are tears in his eyes, well no one needs to know about that.

 

***

 

Hanging out with Tyson and Gabe was a spectacularly bad plan and it is not a mistake he plans on repeating so he spends time with the other guys on the team. He goes to Kerfy, JT, and Josty’s place for video games. He gets taken out to dinner by Soderburg and gets an “I’m here for you if you need to talk,” speech. But mostly, he hangs out with Nail. In the absence of spending time with Tyson and Gabe, Nail has probably become his best friend on the team. 

 

He can’t hide everything from Nail forever so one night when Nail asks, like he does every so often, if he’s okay, Mikko finally breaks down and says, “No, I’m really not.”

 

“What’s been going on?”

 

“Well... “ Mikko takes a deep breath. He should probably start with the basic fact. “First, I’m gay, which by itself is difficult but that’s not really the problem.”

 

“Thank you for telling me. If that’s not the problem than what is?”

 

“I have feelings for someone, well two someones but they don’t have feelings for me.”

 

“Is this about Tyson and Gabe?”

 

“Easy to guess?”

 

“Well, you’ve stopped hanging out with them and you used to be with them all the time. It’s obvious something’s wrong if you’re looking.”

 

“Oh great.”

 

“Not that people would guess, it just looks like you guys had a fight or something.” 

 

“I’m glad it’s not obvious but, um, it really fucking sucks.” 

 

“I’m sorry. I wish there was more I could say.” 

 

“I appreciate it. Can we just put on a movie?” 

 

***

 

Why? Why did Mikko volunteer to do Valentine’s day? Now he’s going to forced to write Valentines to people he’s in love with that don’t share his feelings, and play it all off as a joke. It’s not funny. At least he roped Nail into doing it with him. He writes his Valentines. The day of though, Nail forgets and Mikko is on his own. He wishes he could just not show up but that’s not the kind of guy he is. He pulls himself together, does the video segment with Lauren, and barely manages not to cry on camera about the joke Valentine he gets. After, as he’s leaving the stage, Lauren puts a hand on his arm.

 

“You okay, Mikko?”

 

“Yeah,” he laughs. “I’m fine. Great. Just kind of tired.” 

 

“Okay. Just wanted to make sure.” She smiles at him and pats his arm, like she knows he’s not fine but that he will be. Her gets far enough away that he thinks it’s acceptable to just sit down, back against the wall. He puts his head between his knees and just breathes. In, out, in, out. He must zone out because the next thing he knows is that there are people sitting across from him. He looks up to find Tyson and Gabe.

 

“Hi.” Tyson smiles shyly. 

 

“Hi.” Mikko says, voice quivering. This is not what he needs right now.

 

“We, um… we have something for you.” Gabe says, and hands him an envelope. 

 

He takes it, hands shaking and opens it and finds a letter that reads: 

 

_ Dear Mikko, _

_ We never planned for this. For you. You brought us back together when neither of us thought it possible to fix what we had broken but you did and we are forever grateful. But even though we’ve been happy, it’s felt like something, someone, was missing. That someone is you. We’ve talked about this for a long time and we love you. We love you so much. We wanted to ask you to date us but we couldn’t figure out a way to say it out loud. So consider this us, asking you to please, date us. We love you and we miss you and we need you in our lives. Please give us a chance. _

_ All our love, _

_ Gabe and Tyson _

 

He sucks in a loud breath. He must be dreaming. He must have fallen asleep in this hallway and be dreaming because this is too much. This is too good to be true. It’s everything he wants and knows he can’t have.

 

“Is this… am I dreaming?” Mikko asks.

 

“No,” Gabe laughs. “You’re not.”

 

“This is real. We… I…” Tyson starts and trails off, looking at Mikko, hesitant. Mikko looks him in the eye and Tyson continues. “We love you.”

 

“So much,” Gabe finishes. “Please, if there is even a slight chance that you feel the same…”

 

“Yes,” Mikko interrupts. “Yes. I’ve… I have been in love with you both and I never even hoped… Yes. Please.” 

 

They are all looking at each other, in awe, unsure how to move. So Mikko leans over, and presses a gentle kiss to Tyson’s lips and then pulls away and gives Gabe a matching one. 

 

“Let’s maybe get out of this hallway and get some coffee or something,” Mikko says, grin splitting his face. 

 

“Yeah,” Gabe answers. “Let’s do that.” 

 

They all get up and walk out together, Mikko in the middle. Gabe and Tyson each take one hand and squeeze before letting go. 

 

***

 

Epilogue:

 

Mikko still can’t tie a tie. His mom tried to teach him but he just gets confused, doing everything backwards and it just comes out sloppy. She tied all his for him before he left Finland his first summer in the US. So here he is, at the fashion show, with a tie he has to tie and too embarrassed to ask anyone. Gabe sneaks up behind him, slips his arms around Mikko’s waist and presses a kiss to the back his neck just above his collar. 

 

“Need some help?” Gabe asks, pressed up tight against Mikko. He turns in the circle of Gabe’s arms.

 

“Please,” he says. 

 

Gabe steps back and ties the tie quickly and expertly. He kisses Mikko on the nose and steps back.

 

“You know, I do this for Tyson before every game. I think I’d like to do the same for you.” 

 

“You want me to drive over before games and drive in with you guys?”

 

“Well, I figured you could eat lunch and take our pregame nap with us too. And then maybe stay after? I just… we both want you around all the time.” 

 

Mikko’s face breaks out into a grin so wide it hurts his face. “I’d really like that.”

 

Gabe leans in and kisses him softly on the lips. “I love you.”

 

“I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> JT Compher, Tyson Jost, Alex Kerfoot, and Carl Soderberg all make an appearance but don't have any speaking parts so I didn't tag them.
> 
> I'm sorry Matt Duchene. I know things were really shitty for you in Colorado. I still <3 you.


End file.
